1crits0fails12kills
Mostly Mortals - Session Recap
March 12, 2026
- Players: Dom (Caelum/CJBN), David (Orion), Cary (Idril), Jose (Shirley), Jesse (Oggtok)
- Absent: Tara (Kimber), Maxi (Diego)
- Mood: Chaotic Humorous
What Happened
We finished the zombie fight at the cemetery (11 zombies + 1 ogre zombie = 550 gold bounty!), explored the grounds, and CJBN Misty Stepped into a sealed mausoleum alone like an absolute madman. There’s a lich inside with roughly 10 zombies. Session ended on a cliffhanger with Caelum trapped inside. The lich rolled a 29 on initiative. Good times.
Session Timeline
- Wall of Fire aftermath - Session opens with the party dealing with the burning cemetery entrance from last session
- The Thumping - Strange vibrations from inside a mausoleum. Something big is moving behind the stone door.
- Ogre Zombie bursts through - The mausoleum door explodes outward. A massive ogre zombie charges.
- Orion one-shots the ogre - Divine Smite with Destone. 38 damage. It had 32 HP. Fight over in one round.
- Zombie waves hit the cemetery - 11 zombies swarm from the grounds. Caelum goes Bladesong, Shirley Topples, Oggy double-taps.
- 550 gold bounty collected - Cemetery cleared. Party catches their breath.
- Investigating the Mexos Mausoleum - Chiseled-out inscriptions, sealed stone door. Only “Mexos” is still readable.
- Trying to force the door - Combined STR checks (18+19) barely open it inches. Something pushes back from inside.
- The party tries everything - Arrows, persuasion (“Mexos!”), glass-breaking (“Mazel tov!”), discussed throwing potions.
- Caelum Misty Steps in alone - Through the sealed door. Reckless. Bold. Absolutely unhinged.
- Lich and ~10 zombies - Caelum finds Mexos hovering above a sarcophagus with green necromantic fire.
- Initiative rolled. Lich gets 29. - Session ends on cliffhanger. The party is stuck outside.
Encounters
| # | Enemies | Location | Outcome | Notable |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | 1 Ogre Zombie | Cemetery mausoleum (burst through door) | Victory (1 round) | Orion one-shot with Divine Smite (38 dmg, it had 32 HP) |
| 2 | ~11 Zombies (waves) | Cemetery grounds | Victory (~3-4 rounds) | Caelum Voltedge combo, Shirley Topple, group cleanup |
| 3 | 1 Lich + ~10 zombies | Mexos Mausoleum (sealed) | CLIFFHANGER | Caelum Misty Stepped in alone. Initiative rolled. Session ended. |
Damage Highlights
- Orion: 38 damage in one round on the ogre (nat 19 + Divine Smite 3d8 vs undead). Killed it outright.
- Caelum: 7 slashing + 6 lightning + 17 lightning on one zombie (Voltedge + Bladesong combo)
- Idril: ~26 damage sneak attack on the ogre
- Shirley: 13 damage first strike, attempted Topple (triggered 2024 rules discussion)
- Oggy: 9 damage on a zombie, “shot it in the chest and remembered it’s a zombie. Double tap in the head, boys.”
Party Status (Post-Combat, Pre-Lich)
| Character | Condition | Resources Used |
|---|---|---|
| Caelum (CJBN) | Healthy | Bladesong (1 use), Misty Step (1x 2nd-level slot) |
| Orion | Healthy | Divine Smite (1x 1st-level slot), Cure Wounds (1x 1st-level slot) |
| Shirley | Healed (took 12 bludgeoning, healed 13 from Orion) | 1 healing potion consumed during exploration |
| Idril | Healthy | Arrows used |
| Oggtok | Healthy | Minimal resource usage |
| Kimber | Absent | ”Curled up in a fetal position in bed” |
Key Decisions
- Shirley grave-robbed a sarcophagus (nat 20 investigation) and pocketed gold before Lawful Good Orion could see.
- Orion switched to Destone (the Moonstone Crown-destroying hammer) before approaching the mausoleum. “We’re dealing with something nasty.”
- Dom’s AI flagged a red flag: “Nun posting bounties for a cemetery full of undead. Why can’t the local clergy handle it?”
- Caelum Misty Stepped into the sealed mausoleum alone after the party exhausted all other options. Bold, reckless, perfect cliffhanger.
Quests & Progress
- Zombie Bounties (ESCALATED): 11 zombies + 1 ogre zombie killed. 550 gold earned (11 x 50g). Ogre bounty TBD. Quest is NOT complete. Lich discovered.
- Enraged Legion connection? Very unlikely. The cemetery lich (likely named Mexos) appears to be a separate, local threat.
- Moonstone Crown: Orion now has Destone at the ready.
Unresolved Threads
- Mexos is likely the lich’s name. Inscriptions deliberately chiseled out. Only “Mexos” was decipherable.
- ~10 zombies with the lich. Caelum didn’t get a proper count.
- The nun’s motives. Why post zombie bounties when a lich is running the cemetery?
- Vibrations behind the party. Oggy detected something big. Never investigated.
- Shirley’s sarcophagus gold. Amount not specified. Orion doesn’t know.
Loot & Gold
- Gold earned: 550g bounty (11 zombies x 50g). Ogre bounty TBD.
- Gold found: Unknown amount from sarcophagus (Shirley pocketed it)
- Items used: 1 Healing Potion (Shirley)
- Equipment change: Orion switched to Destone (hammer)
Reminders for Next Session
- IMMEDIATE: Caelum is alone inside a sealed mausoleum with a lich (init 29) and ~10 zombies. Party is outside.
- Initiative: Lich 29, Caelum dirty 20, party stuck outside the sealed door
- Caelum’s escape options: Dimension Door (500ft, bring one creature), Misty Step (30ft)
- Party needs to breach the door. Combined STR checks (18+19) only opened it inches.
- Kimber (Tara) returns next session.
- Collect bounty gold once cemetery is actually cleared. 550g confirmed, ogre bonus TBD.
- Try not to die.